Confrontation is never easy but always necessary. Not confronting sin, conflict or offenses communicates we really don't love the people involved. While everyone must confront, remember, there are no church police - people who search out sinners to confront. Here are some tips on confronting others:
1. Confrontation should always be for restoration of relationship - to God and to each other.
2. Follow the steps of Matthew 18:15-17 for confronting sin and offense
- Confront one on one - in private
- If that doesn't bring reconciliation, take one or two witnesses with you
- If that doesn't work, the church leadership should become involved for discipline purposed
in repentance and restoration
3. Make sure you don't confront if you are offended, bitter, or angry
4. Confront in love. This means show gentleness, humility and encouragement.
5. Confront early on - when you see "smoke". Don't wait till the situation is blazing out of
6. Only seek counsel about how to confront from someone more mature spiritually than you.
7. Don't gossip about the situation. Don't go and tell everyone what the person has done when you haven't gone to them.
8. Make forgiveness and repentance priorities.
9. Pray with the person and offer to meet to help them overcome sin.
10. If others have been wronged, counsel the person to go to them and make it right. Offer to go with them.
11. Be prepared for rejection. Don't try and force repentance. Don't get angry. Continue to pray for this person and practice love and forgiveness towards them.
12. Use scripture not personal opinion.
Scriptures on confronting: Galatians 6:1; 2 Timothy 2:24-25; James 5:19-20; Matthew 7:3-5